Reginald's Corner

Hey Fans,

 Yours truly has posted some new jokes. Take a look.!

Oh, and hey, check out the sports stories while you're at it!

 Mantle the Magnificient

 Hello Fans

My celebrity status is really getting around. I just got a call from Smithers (the Lodge’s butler) and was asked to “attend Miss Lodge’s social gathering this evening.” Pool attire is the fashion requirement.

I know Ronnie was just too shy to call me herself, with me being an almost Superstar and all.

That’s cool! She can be around me as much as she wants. I’m going to give her the chance to be my date for the school dance, too.

Such a Lucky Girl!

The Celeb

Reggie

The BIGGEST LOOSER in Riverdale strikes again! I mean, what is up with this guy? Just because he can’t get it together doesn’t mean he has to ruin it for everyone else (specifically me.)

I was running a tad late for Ron’s party; I had to stop by the carwash to give my new car the once over. So I got there about the time Archie showed up in his aged jalopy.

He cut me off and pulled in the drive ahead of me. I have to tell you all the fumes from that old thing about made me sick. So I shut my sunroof and passed the fool to get away from the stink.

After we both parked, he then raced me to the house on foot. I had to run! The reputation of the football team was on the line. How would it look to have a member of the cross country team beat the Star Running-Back?

We got to the patio with Red-On-The-Head just a bit ahead of me, he THEN tripped right into Ronnie… and they both went into the pool.

Needless to say she was not at all happy and I, like everyone else, got caught in the crossfire. The party ended with a splash not a bang.

The good news for all the Riverdale chicks is Mr. Mantle will be going to the first dance of the year STAG. So, without a ball and chain around my neck I can dance with them all.

Reg

 Oh yes, I’m back, I’m better, I’m the BEST!!!!

It is so great to be me. School is awesome. All the girls want to be around me (well all but maybe two). Classes are easy and YES, I AM THE NEW STARTING RUNNING-BACK for Riverdale High.

This is going to be the most excellent year I’ve ever had, and that’s saying something.

See ya around the water fountain.

Reg

P.S. Thanks Julia for catching my spelling error. It was a test. You passed.

It was this morning before school, actually. When I arrived, there he was – with his red hair and freckles - standing in my parking spot. At first I could not believe my eyes. I mean, that takes nerve – especially after what he did at Ron’s party. I was thinking a good old-fashioned football tackle might be in order.

But, before I could say or do anything, the dude apologized. And rightfully so!

As matter of fact he apologized several times. It was getting pretty pathetic and a little embarrassing. So being the gracious fellow that I am, I accepted his pitiful apology.

Then the dunce asked me for a favor. ME!

I was gonna turn him down flat (and enjoy doing it) but once he explained what he was trying to do, I saw he could not pull it off without help from The Reg. (Plus, it seemed like it would be a lot of fun.) So, being the affable fellow I am, I agreed.

My exact words were, “Sure. But you owe me BIGTIME!”

Sometimes I’m just way too nice a guy.

What did he want? You’ll just have to wonder about that, won’t you…

Reggie

It would appear that the news is out. Yes that’s right, Riverdale’s most popular guy (that would be ME) is not taking anyone to the dance this Saturday night.

Once this news circulated around the school (not sure how that happened) I’ve been asked to the dance by no less than 10 girls. But my answer is always the same, “Sorry. Big Plans.”

Can’t tell you what it is, but I will say this: you’re all going to love it.

Well, I’m heading to football practice.

Reggie

I’m going to be great. IF everyone else does their job, that is. I can tell you that the rest of the team is nervous as all get out… but not me. I can catch anything thrown my way and I can outrun anyone on Springdale’s team.

By the way, Archie’s big secret is…

Reg

Great Job Riverdale High Football Team! What a magnificent game, which is saying something because this was the first game of the year AND the first time many of us played together. It was like artwork in motion. My man Moose came through with an awesome tackle that opened a door for me to score the winning TD.

Good as the game was, I have to say Saturday night was even better. I’ve never had so much fun. I hope you all know by now that Archie’s big plan was to get the band back together for the school dance. He was amazing… as a matter of fact, everyone was.

It was an honor to play on both teams…

AND CONGRATS TO BETTY for setting a new school record in Cross Country.

I’m sorry – I’m sorry – I’m sorry!!!!

Though there was some truth in what I said above…

I Really Have To Say….

I WAS THE BEST, GREATEST, MOST AWE-INSPIRING PERSON ON THE FIELD AND ON THE STAGE!!!!!!

The Marvelous REG

Between school work and football practice, there has been precious little time for me and the many females at Riverdale High who want to bask in my presence.

But hey, that’s the price I have to pay for being a Super Star.

I give so much of myself to others. I’m surprised I’ve not been nominated for some kind of humanitarian award.

(Note to self: see if there is a way to nominate myself)

Back to me: I’ve had 2 dates already this week and I have 3 lined up for the weekend. It looks like I’m going to have to do some creative schedule juggling.

Well, I have to get back to my homework, now. Can’t allow those grades to drop. Daddy wouldn’t like that. J

Reggie

I did it again. I lead my team to another Riverdale Victory. What a game! Of the 29 points scored, I scored 21.

Guess I need to check up on my buddies. I’ve been told they’re trying to book our band to play at an event or two this fall. Need to make sure my cut is what it should be.

I had a lunch date yesterday (she bought) and I have a movie date tonight I need to get ready for. I already told her, “No teary-eyed romance flicks for The Reg”. We’re seeing Blood of Dracula’s Dog. Supposed to be a great flick.

Later.

The Reg

My team needs thank me. Because of our (I should say MY) victory Friday night, we only had a short practice today… with no pads.

I had very little homework and I turned down a date for tonight. I think I’ll just hang around someone I like better then anyone else. Know who that is?

That’s right… ME!!!!!

What great company I am. No wonder everyone wants to be with me.

You know, sometimes it’s just not fair. I mean, when you’re the coolest kid in Riverdale, and you want to be around someone else just as cool… well, you just can’t because there IS no one else!

It’s lonely at the top… but not THAT lonely!

IT’S GREAT TO BE ME!!!

Reg

Daddy is a little miffed with me. I guess he thinks my social life needs to slow down just a tad.

So, no more weeknight dates. Oh well, I was spreading myself a little thin lately.

I hear Ronnie has a new sweater for me to wear Saturday. I was going to say, I hope it looks good on me, but it’s me - EVERYTHING looks good on The Reg!

Here comes Daddy. Got to sign off.

Reggie

That dunderhead, Moose, got a bit too enthusiastic at Thursday’s practice. Now I have to watch tonight’s game from the bench… with ice on my knee.

Moose said he was sorry. Between you and me, I think he saw me talking to Midge at lunch on Wednesday and this was his way of saying, Back off!

If you see him, tell the big galoot I got the message.

I think tonight’s game is going to be a bust.

Reg